8 Ways To Prevent Swamp Ass This Summer
Summer is approaching, so you know what that means—summer vacations, chilling on the beach, extra deodorant - and the dreaded swamp ass.
Whether you call it monkey butt, swamp crotch, gooch goop, or booty dew, it's a problem that soaks us all when the temps climb in the summer months.
In solidarity, we did you a favor and laid out the eight best ways to prevent a sweaty butt this summer. When your third pit turns into the Everglades during festival season, don't say the DUDES didn't warn you.
What Is Swamp Ass?
Have you ever stood up from a dry chair in the summertime, only to feel like you sat in something soupy? Or have you ever seen a poor dude unknowingly strolling around with a giant dark spot on the back of his slacks?
Both of these are textbook examples of swamp ass, which refers to the sweaty mess that accumulates in your butt crack and further nether regions—especially in muggy weather.
Typically, the sweat glands you should worry about are located in your underarms (eccrine glands), which release an oily substance that produces body odor. The glands in your nether regions (eccrine glands) produce odorless sweat. However, if your crack isn't clean and you sit in odorless sweat for a while, bacteria and germs can form that creates that special swiss odor.
What Causes Swamp Ass?
Sweat is an essential body function that regulates your body temperature. Everybody's butt sweats—that said, too much sweat below the belt can turn into a breeding ground for bacteria and a chronic itchy feeling.
"Swamp ass develops when there is a high amount of perspiration between the cheeks of the butt, leading to skin irritation, along with overgrowth of yeast and bacteria," says dermatologist Joshua Zeichner, MD.
Could your swass be serious enough for a doctor's visit?
Aside from embarrassment and inconvenience, swamp ass rarely indicates a serious problem and can be managed on its own. However, if your crotch is consistently soaked to the point that it interferes with everyday life, you can check with your doctor.
It may be the case that you have hyperhidrosis, which triggers excessive sweat, even if you're not exercising or in a hot climate. If that's the case, your doctor can write a prescription.
For standard cases of swamp ass, here are eight ways to stay dry below the belt that don't involve harsh antiperspirants that clog your sweat glands.
8 Ways to Prevent Swamp Ass
1. Tighten Up Your Hygiene Habits
Draining the swamp starts in the shower. While over-showering is definitely a thing, it's a different ball game in the humid summer months. A daily shower will kill nasty bacteria that festers in those forgotten crevices below the belt.
When it comes to wiping, it's essential to keep your crack as clean as can be. Hint: you're probably wiping your ass the wrong way. When you're ready to take your cleanup game to the next level, head over to Amazon and check out the DUDE Wiper 1000.
2. Trim Down Your Butt Bush
If you have a jungle in your pants, you're allowing all that butt sweat and bacteria to fester in your underwear. The answer for your butt bush isn't shaving or waxing—that's just going to cause more problems, which you can read more about in our post about conquering a hairy ass.
Instead, regularly use a trimmer to manscape your nether regions, which gives all that sweat you produce less room to hide.
3. Wear Breathable Underwear
If you have a swass problem, you need to invest in some new underwear. Basic cotton underwear is good because it's breathable. The downside is once they get wet, they stay wet.
Linen is also good because it's the lightest fabric, but it's not exactly practical for everyday use.
So invest in some hi-tech, sweat-wicking underwear like DUDE Underwear. And don't forget to carry a spare pair of underwear in your work or gym bag, which will bail you out from any soiled situations.
4. Lose The Skinny Jeans
Aside from the uncomfortable, moist feeling in your pants, the most embarrassing part of swass is the tire track of sweat that can form on your backside, leaving you wondering if everyone has noticed the festering pond in your pants.
Tight clothing makes this scenario even worse because they keep all the moisture in. The solution is to wear loose-fitting or baggy clothing on hot days to give you a better chance of airing out your butt crack. Consider wearing your dark jeans to hide those embarrassing sweat stains better. Comfortable underwear and loose-fitting pants can also cut down on the dreaded chub rub (read: no chafing).
5. Cut Down On The Caffeine
While caffeine can help jumpstart your morning ritual, it also stimulates your central nervous system and activates your sweat glands. So if you're a member of the big sweat club, drinking stimulants can lead to excessive sweating you don't need (the same goes for meat sweats).
6. Powder Your Jewels
After drying yourself off from your morning shower, the best thing you can do to start your day right is by giving your nether regions a proper dusting with DUDE Powder.
Unlike most body powders for men or baby powder, ours is talc-free and infused with natural odor-fighting ingredients like menthol and aloe. That menthol chill you feel after a proper dusting? It means it's working. Most importantly, you'll be free to dominate your day without worrying about nasty odors from your third pit.
7. Freshen Up Mid-Day
Swamp ass usually creeps in during the late afternoon, but you might not have access to a shower. If you're away from your home throne, keep some DUDE Wipes on hand to freshen up between meetings. They've got aloe and vitamin E to soothe your nether regions and keep swass at bay.
If your armpits need attention, too, opt for the extra-large DUDE Shower Wipes. It's like having an on-demand shower in your pocket.
8. Move Around to Let Your Balls Breathe
Sitting on a soupy butt for long periods of time blocks airflow and presses sweat deeper into your skin, making it even more moist. It might seem counterintuitive since movement makes you sweat, but walking around often can dry up your nether regions by letting your crotch breathe.
Don't Let Swass Ruin Your Summer
Men are sweaty beasts. There are no two ways about it. We churn out nearly a thousand gallons of sweat per year. You can't stop Mother Nature, but a few tweaks to your daily routine will keep your Dude Regions cool and dry, sparing you the shame of a soupy butt.